While channel-surfing last night, I came across the almost indescribable experience that is E!'s "Star Dates: Dustin Diamond". Here are just some of the highlights:

1. Dustin took his first date to Yankee Doodle's on the Santa Monica Promenade, which happens to be the bar where (thanks to the Joe Mulder curse*) I watched Pitt lose its Sweet Sixteen game to Kent State after Indiana had knocked off Duke to leave us as the highest remaining seed in our bracket. OK, maybe this was actually a lowlight.

(*I could watch any sporting event very enjoyably with Joe; however, if it was an important game involving a Pittsburgh team, the Burgh squad was doomed if I watched with him.)

2. Dustin and the skank (note: I do not mean this as a generic Diceman/construction worker term of general derision for woman; I am just using it as a very precise term to describe the personality/essence of Mr. Diamond's first date) made for a nice pair because they seemed to share one very special bond: they both wanted to get her as drunk as humanly possible. The three basic shots were a cut to her cleavage, a cut to Diamond forcing another large beer or glass full of liquor onto her, and a cut to her double fisting whatever she was drinking. After she staggered back to the car, we got some post-script talking-head scenes that suggested a heavy makeout session and possible intercourse after the cameras stopped rolling, but only Screech and the skank will ever know for sure.

3. Dustin's second date was with the third runner-up in the World's Strongest Woman competition, and for their date she took him to Gold's Gym. I'm not making any of this up.

4. The second date actually seemed like the beginning of an ongoing relationship. Again, not making this up.

If you can catch a re-broadcast of this show, by all means it is the comedy gift that just keeps on giving.