If you can judge a man and his mood by the mix CD he puts together from music he's been listening to quite a bit lately for the drive back to school from a trip home for Thanksgiving, then judge away:

1. People Who Died, Jim Carroll Band
2. Letter From An Occupant, New P0rnographers
3. Fairytale of New York, The Pogues
4. The District Sleeps Alone Tonight, The Postal Service
5. Science vs. Romance, Rilo Kiley
6. Failure Is OK, Robespierre and His Reign of Terror
7. Vanessa From Queens, Stephen Malkmus
8. Since U Been Gone/Maps, Ted Leo
9. Undone (The Sweater Song), Weezer
10. Sugar Cube, Yo La Tengo
11. Duel Duet, Shock Treatment soundtrack
12. Walt Whitman Bridge, Marah
13. Chasing Heather Crazy, Guided By Voices
14. The Mariner's Revenge Song, The Decembrists
15. Dead Ringer for Love, Cher & Meat Loaf
16. Bitches Ain't Shit, Ben Folds
17. The Stars of Track and Field, Belle & Sebastian
18. Ballad of The Sneak

If I had to self-analyze, it sounds like a bit of melancholy, combined with a pining for East Coast cities along with regret for having to kill my cousin for sleeping with my ho. Some of that sounds right, and some of it sounds wrong. I have been a tad depressed lately about all the standard things (food, sex, self-esteem), and in fact have started some occasional counseling to try to work through it.

The weekend with the fam didn't help, because Dad seems to be at a real crossroads in his long-time battle with cancer. He's had prostate cancer for about 8 years and has been managing it via a number of alternative therapies and some more traditional stuff, but no drastic treatments. But now there's some bone cancer as well, and he sounds like he's finally looking at some chemo. As you might imagine, cranberry sauce can't take away much of that particular sting. My Dad is one of the most optimistic people I know, and he tells us he's not looking forward to the chemo side effects, but he's not especially worried. My Mom is one of the most pessimistic, and she had that look in her eye a few times that said, "This one's real trouble." I'll keep my predilections to myself, but if you want a hint, you could notice that I'm training for the profession that advises clients to have hair dryer warnings saying that the product shouldn't be used while sleeping or showering.